I Need Do Nothing!

I had to ponder this statement, I Need Do Nothing for a while before I really understood it. I need do nothing to awaken from this dream because I am already back with God.

What did that news do to my life and my way of thinking until now? I have done so much over the past forty years in an effort, and I say effort, to awaken to something other than what I thought I was. Hard work, many workshops, lots of tears and lots of time spent in an effort to heal and change my existance here.

Now I am not regretting all of this work. It was absolutely the only thing I could do. I didn't know anything else at the time. Even to this day right now I still find myself in the mode of trying. So to accept I need do nothing was seemingly an insult on the way I had lived my life and one that needed contemplation.

This morning a friend emailed me about a link I had sent him to watch a movie documentary called Thrive. His perception of the movie was the opposite to mine and he felt he had to save me from my way of thinking.I reacted to his idea of saving me then quickly reverted back to myself, knowing he isn't really here, and asking me, what is he reflecting back to me right now. I perceived him as trying to save me, no, I am trying to save myself. Was this a truer statement? Yes. I was trying to save myself from an illusion. This is how I saw him, more afraid of the illusion than using it as a means to wake up. He was my gift to me today to show me how small my thinking has been . How I have tried to avoid life not because I knew better, but because I was afraid of it. Wow, how much more of life is there for me to explore?

Holy spirit uses this illusion to wake me up and I had limited the illusion so I could get back faster, or so I thought, to a place I never really left. Yes, I am laughing out loud right now, what an illusion that is.

I too had spent many years thinking I was helping my friends when they didn't need help. Of course, like my friend this morning I was doing it from a place of love, wasn't I? Now I see more clearly that I was laying on them my own limited thinking because that is all I knew. I am not judging myself for that. I used to judge myself for being asleep to things in life but not anymore. I believe we are all doing the best we can in any given moment, otherwise we would be doing something different.

So no more serious journey. Today is a new day, filled with new thoughts and a lot more joy. Where do you want me today Holy spirit? Which part of this illusion are you going to have me engage today so that I can see another reflection of the self that still thinks it needs to be awakened from the dream?